Slow and Steady

Realisation

Posted on: August 20, 2012

I’ve just come to a realisation that has made me cry… bawl actually. I’ve realised how much help that I’m NOT getting. My mum is away. My sister has cooked, eaten and left the dishes in there. Now my mum would usually do it, or I would try and struggle to do it. However I’m supposed to be keeping a diary of the care I receive, and to be honest, I’m not cared for!

I don’t ask for help because it just feels like I’m being a burden, and it’s not like me wanting to be independent. When I asked her to empty the bin, she threw the lid on the floor, swore the whole time, then slammed the door when she came in and stomped upstairs. Would you ask someone like that for anything?

I’ve sent her a message asking her to clean up when she gets in, and have not had a reply. She has been responding to me fine all day. If she doesn’t come home, I’m going to ask my friend to help me. 

 

OK. An hour later. A decision has been made. I need to stop worrying and ask for what I want. She’s said she’ll wash up in the morning, and that she will hoover my room too which needs doing badly. If I get a negative reaction, then I’ll ask a friend. I need to learn this skill because if I don’t, I’ll not be able to leave the house. I know that sounds dramatic, but I need help now. God help me. 

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3 Responses to "Realisation"

Nice to see you blogging again. I often have many people let me down. Often those who are closest to me. Friends can be of help at times. I understand not wanting to burden anyone. I pray you get better but in the meantime I hope those around understand your health is not your fault and you can only do what you can. It’s hard to stay positive but keep moving forward. x

Thank you my dear, it’s truly appreciated! x x x

[…] coupled with the wheelchair scenario and the fact my room still hasn’t been hoovered over 10 days later has left me in a  bad state […]

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